between calls at Tiffany’s

So here’s the thing. I’m about to pull the ultimate jerkwad move and say this thing that I’m about to say and I’m sorry. I mean, I’m mostly sorry. I’m a little sorry. I know it’s a jerky move.

I’m stressed out. Like, kind of really stressed out. And the largest part of my stress isn’t even something I can really talk about publicly so I just have to be like “Wibble, wibble, I am so stressed out BUT IT’S A SECRET, OKAY?!?” But I realized the other day, while browsing the fricking Tiffany’s website on my phone at work and seriously considering buying something, I am getting stressed out to the point where I need to check myself and people are starting to talk. I think. I mean, I’m starting to talk. 

“So what’s the deal, Eeej,” I hear absolutely none of you saying because we’re on the internet, “and, really? Tiffany’s? SERIOUSLY? You’d just lose it, anyway.” I KNOW. But I’ve got this thing going on and a new job that I start training for next week and there’s the house thing and I’m trying to lose weight but I’m stressed out so I had a two hour lunch at the Moon the other day, which is code for “drank cider and ate a grilled cheese with some friends and laughed and had fun because it was fun” and that shouldn’t even be a thing because why would it be? But I always get eeked out and then do this thing where I just tiptoe around the issue and get all anxious and obsessive about something completely unrelated.

I don’t know if anyone caught this but I can be a little neurotic sometimes.

And I realized today, as the Halloween candy and Oktoberfest starts appearing, summer’s almost over and that’s a thing unto itself. It’s impossible for the seasons to shift without me being like “Hrm. So this is another chunk of time that slipped away from me” even if I’ve had a great time. Because I’m greedy for experiences, I guess. And not to be old and stuff but, really, where is time going? I remember sitting on the couch between Eeem and Will on New Year’s Eve and it seems like it was about two months ago. And that summer list? The less said the better.

Which isn’t to say that I’m not having a great summer and I’m probably just freaking out about the job thing. Which is about all I have to freak out about right now that is even worth it so I need to figure that out.

And you know what? There has been a string of remarkable good fortune here in Jameson Towers and that freaks me out more than anything. What is wrong with me? I wish I could just roll with it.

But, seriously, I am having a great summer. Me and my neighbor made some beer last weekend and, in approximately three months, we will be sippin’ on some delicious Vanilla Latte Stout, just in time for that kind of weather. My hair has reached a more manageable length and Will is doing fun-for-Will-stuff and we’re going to see Shakespeare in the Park with friends and hanging out with people we like and things are good. I saw Weezer in the VIP section of a casino for the cost of an ice cream cone. Dude, that happened. There’s lots of adventures happening and, no, they’re not exactly on my list but, really, who makes a list like that and actually does that stuff? But I’ve had a delightful summer and, as Mr. BFF just pointed out, there’s still time.

Right. Things are good. I think I just needed to remind myself. Or think about it. Or just calm down.

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